New and Continuing

  On December 31st we come to the end of one 'season', 2016, and look to the start of a new beginning - 2017. Any unfinished 'business' needing attention? Do you feel you were successful in attaining your 2016 goals? Do you have 2017 goals with their objectives and timelines in mind? If you are similar to most of us, the answer is a kind of vague non-response. However... you should give some thought to your answers. 

  I would suggest that the most important consideration is your relationship with the Lord - who do you want to Be and how has your relationship grown? Can you look back on 2016 and see the growth in depth in your relationship? Or... Sadly, I suspect that our relationship with the Lord is not high on our priority list, what we always do and do first. But we can always choose to change this rather cavalier approach to our most important relationship. Depth, growth, continuing, active should be some of the adjectives that characterize our relationship.

  No finger pointing – but I believe how we determine and act on our relationship with the Lord is the single most important decision we make. Granted, we slip, fall, or scrape our knees but do we then get back up and resolve to continue? Continuing in the development in relationship then becomes the second most important decision we make, because it is always inevitable that there will be challenges to this.

  Whatever you decide is your decision and no one has the right to imply that you aren’t ‘doing enough’ (I always ask – according to whose standards?). My point at the start of 2017 is simply to offer this as a decision for you to include in determining who you are becoming. But never choose to be less than what your destiny can be.

Miracles still happen

  It depends on whether we have eyes that see and hearts that understand. There are so many miracles that happen all around us - some we are privileged to see, some we are totally unaware of or don't see that 'it' falls into the miracle category. Examples: a sunset of incredible hues, the birth of a new creature into this world - whether this is human or animal, the inexpressible joy when someone accepts the Lord, flowers, a hand of love on another's face... and I could go one because miracles are happening all around us when we see.

  If you say you don't see any miracles in your life. Then, my reply is, what are you looking at and looking for? Can you see the small steps toward accomplishing whatever you need/want as a form of miracle? Miracles don't have to be against all odds, they can be the quiet and gentle actions that demonstrate the power of miracles in people's lives. Then again... are you a miracle giver or a miracle want-er? Do you see the miracles that have and are occurring in your life? Does miracle have to come with the definition of stupendous?

  Those who are givers to others seem to tend to experience more miracles in their lives - but not a give to get mentality, the 'cheerful giver' behavior. 

     "Let each one give [thoughtfully and with purpose] just as he has 
      decided in his heart, not grudgingly or under compulsion, for God 
      loves a cheerful giver." (2Corinthians 9:7)

When you give grudgingly your eyes are not open to the wonders of your gift and how it blesses others. Actually, the grudging giver robs themselves which is incredibly sad.

  The greatest gift to mankind occurred over 2000 years ago with the birth of Jesus: His life, becoming our sacrificial lamb, His resurrection. In His wake miracles occurred but He also left us with the joy of spreading His gifts and miracles to others. Remember, your life is an example of a miracle. When you made Jesus the Lord of your life, you entered the world of miracles - receiving them as well as imparting to others. Oh yes, miracles still happen.

One chance

  It's true you know... sometimes we really do have only one chance. People like to tell us to seize the day, but sometimes we need to seize the moment because that may be the only one we get. And it has nothing to do with the current circumstances - being tired, other things demanding our attention, etc. Right now, right here is our opportunity to... be an encouragement, to speak words of truth and life, to offer our time to listen to the other person. Later may be too late.

  Granted, that sounded slightly dramatic. Doesn't lessen the truth. Regardless of what, or who, has suddenly burst into our moment, we need to be attentive right now. How do we handle this? Anger? Frustration? Reluctant? With only part of us? Those are likely candidates for our expression when confronted by these unexpected (and unwanted?) interruptions. The problem is that the other person is needing... right now! 

  Our decision is always whether to respond to the crisis (?), interruption to what we were doing. And in the decision on responding, HOW we will respond. Scripture tells us to bear one another's burdens (Galatians 6:2) but that rarely pops into our thinking at the moment. One thing I am totally convinced of is that whether or not it is a crisis, it is for that other person. I have the choice of giving my attention to them or turning them aside. Grumbling about the inconvenience is never a loving response.

  My choice is to know how I will respond... and for how long. Therefore, my first action is to try and calm the other person so that they can tell their story as coherently as possible. Until they have shared what they are facing, they are incapable of hearing or developing a proactive response. Never forget that it is their problem and so it's their decision as to how to proceed. Our role is really one of listening, asking questions, and when/if they can hear options. We don't make their decisions. However... we may only have this one, very inconvenient moment, to determine how we will respond. Is this time, a one chance only? 

Ending and Beginning

  December and January, for me, mark the ending of a season and beginning of a new one... even if there is carry over from the end into the beginning. It's a time of assessment, introspection, ticking the boxes, developing a new 'game plan' - whatever you want to call it. But it really is important to look back to see where you were a year ago and how you've progressed on your path to your goals. Perhaps it is because I was raised to make New Year's Resolutions, but this habit still sticks with me.

  Mom's approach was quality over quantity when it came to developing those resolutions. Two kept were far more important than 10 made and broken immediately. Was there dedication behind keeping the resolution or only lip service. Then again she had a kind of 'second sight' (discernment in Christian-ese) that she could ask the right questions to discover if there was a determination to 'improve' or not. 

  Besides, if the same resolution kept being broken and repeated the next year, then this was the basis for a different kind of conversation. I've come to believe that her desire was to help me become the best me I could be - which should be the mindset and goal for any resolution regardless of when it is made. So, in determining your 'success' or not from last year should be the starting point of developing the new year's goals and benchmarks to assess how you are doing in terms of growth.

  Quite honestly if you have no intent, purpose, reason to fulfill goals and objectives then why make them? If you don't, at least yearly, look at yourself and who you are and becoming, what your relationship with the Lord is, how you go about being and doing you, how you interact and communicate with others... then do you have endings and beginnings? Do your chapters, seasons, whatever you call them end so you can move toward your new beginnings? They can you know. It depends on whether this is what you want, what you are willing to do to accomplish this and what you are willing to do to stay the same.
  

Birthdays!

  Don't you just love birthdays! I think they are terrific because they heralded your entry into this life. Birthdays should ALWAYS be celebrated... and on the day of the birth - not 2 weeks early, or combined with someone else who has the same day or one close to it, or three days late - on THE day. Personally, I never work on my birthday and if I'm the only one celebrating my event... I do!

  Perhaps my parents were surprised at my early arrival (2 weeks) but God wasn't. Whether 'your date' was early, late, or on time; and whether you were a boy or a girl - probably the only one not surprised was the Lord. And whether or not you realize it, heaven did rejoice when you were born and great love was poured out upon you. What you did with this is your determination - you are created in God's image... but not as a mindless robot.

  Everyone is born with 'potential' - what we do or don't do with this our potential becomes our legacy, our epitaph, our 'mark' on who we are and what we did. Life is an extremely special gift and we should never assume or presume on this. Which is why I think one's birthday should be celebrated. The gift of life was given to us and we can celebrate this gift by how we live our lives. We. How we live our lives. 

  Additionally, yes, we are all born with a gift from the Father. And we are born with the potentiality of fulfilling and living the gift. We may find others with some of the same potentiality, but each person's is special unto themselves. And yes, life isn't always kind or easy and often others do appear to have it easier - not the point. What YOU do with what you have and how this influences who you become is the point. The scripture in Jeremiah when God tells him that He has planned for a hope and a future is the foundation. Birthdays remind us of our gifts and what we are doing with them.

  When birthdays get lost in the shuffle of every day life then we really do diminish the importance. I hope you don't take your or others' birthdays for granted.  Birthdays are really 'no little thing'.

con·sci·en·tious, adjective

  con-sci en tious. Do you think this word describes the person you are? Do you consciously act this way? Webster defines the word: "...governed by or conforming to the dictates of conscience: scrupulous..." Some of the adjectives used to define this word are: upright, honest, just, scrupulous, etc. However, it's just as important to understand how the descriptive word are defined. 

     "Honorable means having or showing a strict regard for what is 
      morally right. Upright implies a strict adherence to moral principles.
      Honest stresses adherence to such virtues as truthfulness, candor,
      fairness. Just stresses conscious choice and regular practice of what
      is right or equitable."

With those adjectives defining and describing the word, conscientious, does this define and describe you? Would you want to be know as conscientious?

  Obviously, this is not a word that can be bandied about nor is the meaning obtrusive - it is a generally recognized universal definition. So, knowing what the implications of this word mean and how, if applied to who you are, defines a strong standard. Does it mean you always live up to this? Absolutely... at least consciously, though we all slip occasionally and need to acknowledge this and begin anew.

  Still the question - would you accept the challenges and 'restrictions' to be a conscientious person? Why... and why not? This is not something to be entered into lightly or without conviction. Perhaps a way to deciding is to look at a person you consider to be conscientious. What sets them apart? Do they seem to be striving to act this way or is it simply part of who they are? Do you see any differences in how you act v. how they do? Do you see how their words and actions are viewed by others? Your experience the same?

  Those are only a few of the issues that need to be understood prior to becoming a person that is deemed to be conscientious. And the definitions aren't negotiable. This is who a conscientious person is, what they do, and how they go about doing it. For me, conscientious and integrous (my word) are two characteristics worthy of pursuing. Quite honestly... they are the pearls that scripture talks about. 

Telling 'it' like it is...

  Does this describe you...or, do you pull your punches? Which behavior is yours? ... and, do you know why? It is important to know how you act and react, but it's equally important to know your why, your motivation. For example - I try very hard to never lie or dilute the truth (as I see and understand it). The reason is extremely basic - I don't have to remember what I said to person A when talking with person B. What I say is what I've said. Very simple. And when there is a change I always try to 'update' those I've made the initial assessment/statement. 

  However, do you take a 'relativistic' approach? That it depends on the person, situation, results that determines your reaction. Shouldn't be. And yes, this does sound like I'm advocating a black/white reaction when we live in a gray world. I keep going back to the scripture that says our 'yes' should be yes and our 'no' no (Matthew 5:37). No equivocation. But what about change? Is this an 'in cement' approach to life and people? Don't circumstances determine? 

  Perhaps a softening would be appropriate... bottom line though is that you need to know and be 'comfortable' with how you approach truth, telling it like you understand (it), etc. We are told in scripture to speak the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15). That isn't always easy. Sometimes, though, it is a case of how we speak truth rather than not speaking a truth that is hard/difficult. But it never is an easy situation of speaking truth v. lying. I do believe that 'how' is the mitigating issue not the question 'if' we speak truth.

  If you would want to know what is seen by someone else rather than possibly being run over by a freight train, then this will answer your wondering about offering unsolicited feedback. If you take a, 'it's not my business' then you never face the uncomfortable situation and decision. As you can see, there are many considerations that determine 'telling it like it is'. Obviously you need to know your personal standard. Sometimes this will result in being misunderstood or seen as a meddler. If your motives are clean then stand by what you think. Remember that when you do speak to provide the qualification - this is what I think, know, believe. The other person will act or not according to their beliefs. 

The Joy of MY Salvation

  I remember this phrase - restore to me, the joy of my salvation. Perhaps extremely naive, I always wondered where they 'lost' or 'misplaced' or had it taken from them. 'Increase' the joy seems a logical extension, but restore? Mincing words? No, I don't think so - I believe this is one of those 'mindset' issues. Granted this scripture is from the Old Testament - "The Joy of the Lord is my strength." (Nehemiah 8:10), but the phrase is still used in Christian-ese.

  The other issue is - WHO does the restoring. Since this phrase seems to be addressed to (?) outside of oneself, the obvious selection of restorer is the Lord. There are other scriptures that show people turning to the Lord and seeking Him to restore whatever it is they think they need/want. If this is the proper act then my question is... what is it we need to do in this process? I find it difficult to believe that we can simply sit down and expect the Lord to drop whatever it is we are seeking into our laps. Actually, my question has far reaching implications and interpretation in the issue of our participation - what is it that we are should or are required to be or do?

  Can you remember back to the time you recognized your need for the Lord and chose to accept Him as your Lord? Do you remember how you felt once you made your proclamation and what you wanted to do as a result of being saved? Do you still feel this way? Are you still 'on fire' for the Lord and the things of the Lord? If so, then why is it you need to have this restored? Is it a mere speed bump in your Christian life? More serious?

  If you have a deep seated need for restoration, do you know how you 'lost' your fire for the things of the Lord? Did the cares of the world infiltrate and rob you? If you don't then you could 'lose' your joy again. The other question is... do you know how you will know when it is restored? Again, if you don't then you could miss what you are seeking. As a suggestion, I think you need to accept the reality that you are intimately involved in your restoration. 

  Obviously, the Lord is the source of the joy - 1Peter 1:8-9, Proverbs 10:28, Romans 15:13 are only a few of the scriptures that relate to what we receive when we act on and live in joy. It is ours. But we need to be more sensitive to attacks on our joy and act in joy. Remember Nehemiah - The joy of the Lord is our strength! So... once you possess the joy... what do you plan on 'doing' with it? May I suggest that you let it show in your words and actions.

Hurt, Disappointed, Frustrated

  Been there? I know I have... frequently at work, and definitely with myself. This is also a prime time when I say or do the 'wrong' thing - at least at the wrong time and often to the wrong person. These are very powerful and negative forces. I don't always exercise my self-control or remember all the encouraging scriptures. This is rarely a shining moment for me. 

  So, what to do? Lashing out typically results in my need to apologize. Besides... sometimes you don't know the source of your hurt/disappointment/frustration. Hitting myself for being gullible or trusting or (fill in the blank) only results in pain - mine. Never effective. One really can't hold a grudge or attempt to get even (whatever that means since you typically end up on the short end of the stick... not your intended desire) or be less than Whose you are. Perhaps it's this last point, realization that needs to govern what you do and say.?

  There's an oft spoken scripture that is used - "Vengeance is mine says the Lord." (Deuteronomy 32:35, Romans 12:19) However, many of these instances are not vengeance issues. Besides, we really can't sic God. And even if we could, what about those times that we are wrong and the target is innocent? Why is retribution our first thought? Is there a different mindset, approach?

  Of course. There is an old saying that there are those, for whatever reason, will always find you at fault. And there are those, whatever your words/actions, will always grant mercy. Personally, I need mercy far more often than I need 'justice'. If I need mercy then I need to extend that to those who cause me hurt/disappointment/frustration... including myself.

  The greatest impediments to resolution and restoration can be the size of the hurt/disappointment/frustration. Do we allow them to grow to mountains of obstacles or see them as the momentary pebbles in our way? If the former then moving on will be extraordinarily difficult. If the latter, then we can forgive, grant mercy, and move on. This decision is ALWAYS in our control.

  

Home is a privilege,

was a line in an episode of one of my favorite programs. The more I thought about it, the more I realized the depth of meaning in that phrase. While home is a privilege, it is also a responsibility. It also forces you define what you believe and how you define - 'home'. Home is both the people as well as what occurs in the place called home. It's the relationships among the various members. It's the emotions that emanate. It's the responsibilities of each of the 'participants'. I could go on, but these are some of the considerations when you define your 'home'. It is a ;physical place", but so much more.

  Home is rarely defined the same by all, yet everyone assumes a universality of definition. The experience of one member may be viewed/experienced differently by another member of the home. Bottom line really is that the an 'occasional' person in the mix may or may not be a member. But... if you are a member of a home then you have 'rights and responsibilities' - you are not a guest. One fact should become apparent - not everyone is a member of your home and there are some whose home is only themselves.

  Regardless of the number, home can truly be a privilege - a blessing, a retreat, a sanctuary from the outside world. It is a place where you can be revived and strengthened. However, that's the positive view of home. For some it is only a place to hang their hat or is a place of unhappiness. Never assume your situation is universal, whether positive or not. So, on the continuum where are you? Is your home a privilege or a place you'd prefer to avoid.

  Never lightly disregard this privilege - with it comes responsibility, that's the price to be part, to be involved in the life of the home. Responsibility confirms membership, a place to belong. And if you are the only one in the home - you still have the responsibility to make your situation as positive as possible. Which, when you think about it... is your privilege.

Our PAST

  Do we ever escape it? Our past sins, mistakes, etc. does God really forgive? Are they truly cast far from us? Isn't there always repercussions, punishments, and other ramifications? Will we ever be truly free? Should we be?!!! Perhaps leaving us to our own devices is the punishment - and that was not a facetious comment. If the problem/issue is based in our pride of us, then that may be an effective punishment.?

  Perhaps, we need to distinguish between our past sins v. any current ones. If it is current, we have a quick remedy found in 1John 1:9. Confess and seek His forgiveness which He extends. However there is a caveat, in my world - our intentions and contrition. We need to be truly sorry and we need to purpose not to repeat. I believe it is the intention of our heart that rules because we are always susceptible to temptations or seductions.

  The issue often is those past sins. We have great difficulty getting beyond them, because we have difficulty in believing they are washed away. But they are. No punishment? Ahhh, there's the rub.  However, our every word and action (or non) is our responsibility and can always has repercussions. This shouldn't hamstrung us, but it is a check. I personally believe that believing we never escape our past is akin to believing that God puts sickness on us to 'teach us (fill in the blank)'. Rubbish. Why would God do this? What do you learn when you are moaning?

  This entire thinking rests on Who we believe God is and what He does, and our relationship with Him. When you accepted Jesus as your Lord, you put a target on your back. From that point on the devil has tried every trick and lie ( John 10:10) that he thinks will stop you/us and our past is his arsenal. He isn't pleased with our turning to the Lord, so it stands to reason that he doesn't want you to be effective. You, your testimony is what he is trying to derail.

  The question you need to ask yourself is - if God hasn't forgiven you your past, how can you possibly turn to him to seek His help in your life? Can you believe He will hear and listen with the past still there between you? But IF He is Who He says is and does what He says He does... then we have a foundation in which to put our trust and hope. Our focus needs to be now and not our past. He's dealt with it and we should too.

Restoration and Relationship.

  For me, the words that Jesus spoke to Peter after His resurrection do resonate for me. Peter is asked the same question three times... I wondered about that until I realized that this related to the three times that Peter had denied Jesus. This was a form of restoration for Peter.

     "... Jesus said to Peter, 'Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me more
      than these (pointing to the others who were with them)?' He said to
      Him, 'Yes, Lord, You know that I love you.' He said to him, 'Feed My 
      lambs.'  He said to him again a second time, 'Simon, son of Jonah, do
      you love Me?' He said to Him, ' 'Yes, Lord, 'You know that I love You.'
      He said to him 'Tend My sheep.' He said to him the third time, "Simon,
      son of Jonah, do you love Me?' Peter was grieved because He said to 
      him the third time, 'Do you love Me?' And he said to Him, 'Lord, You 
      know all things. You know that I love You.' Jesus said to him, 'Feed 
      My sheep." (John 21:15-17) 
    
  Restoration is the method of re-establishing relationship. However, it isn't something we can accomplish... except as we publicly proclaim Jesus as our Lord. And one of the greatest benefits from our act is restoration. It can also be our (next) assignment. It was in Peter's life - feed, tend the Lord's lambs/sheep. Not only did Peter receive his assignment, he was elevated in leadership. The main point though, in my estimation, is that this provided the basis to restore the relationship. 

  When we are called into a relationship with the Lord... I don't believe it is to be on the whim of the moment nor superficial. He knows all in the first place so trying to be evasive is a waste of time. I also don't believe that He wants us to try and be less than we're empowered to Be. He really is attempting to help us Be all we can be as well as become and to Do all we are capable of doing. One of the first tasks in this is to know ourselves... as completely as we allow ourselves to know us.

  Knowing yourself, all the positive as well as negative, arms us to combat those forces arraigned against us to cause us to give up and/or give in. How tragic when we fall for the lies or allow our strengths to become a point of pride and thus a fall. Restoration places our feet firmly on the ground in precisely the right place for us to walk in our relationship with assurance. And, to accomplish the assignment we have been given. 

  We all slip, fall, skin our knee, make mistakes, etc. as we walk on our path in this life. While we are walking toward perfection, we don't achieve the breadth now. This is why we need to know that restoration can occur for us. It isn't a license, nor an excuse. But when it's needed, it is inestimable in value. 

Where's the evidence!!!...

  You say you're sorry! Where's the evidence? You say you'll never do (fill in the blank) again! Where's the evidence? You say you're a Christian! Where's the evidence? In any statement or declaration you make, is there evidence to support it? I'm really not pointing fingers because I ask myself these questions as well. Sometimes... I do have evidence that supports what I'm saying. Sadly, not always. Point being - sometimes we are too glib with our words and actions. They trip off our tongues with little effort or we find ourselves acting unthinkingly. 

  So what are these words then??? And if they aren't an accurate record of what we mean, what we are willing to be and do... why say them? Is it to put our best face forward? To ameliorate what we have just said or done? Do we believe, at that moment, what we are saying - or is there a still, small voice in our heads saying... "Really! Do you truly care enough to change?" Regardless, isn't it difficult for you and others to accept an apology when the behavior is continually repeated? Sorry! What, precisely, are you sorry about?! 

  I realize these words sound harsh. Truth sometimes is. However, if this doesn't speak to you, is not relevant then dismiss them. On the other hand, if there is a spark of truth in them, if they do apply to you on some level, then you have an opportunity to become purposed to change. It partially depends on our motivation, part on our commitment to be our best us, and part on the priority level of changing. Face it, change can be difficult - not the least because we know what those in our lives expect. Still... what, how... and when are you willing to face this issue?

  I titled this - where's the evidence. This is because we are 'old enough' to understand truth. We are able to change, to grow. We can provide evidence of a changed person when we purpose to change. That's why scripture tells US to put off the old man and put on the new (Ephesians 4:22-24). It's something we choose to do, to be. The hope, joy, comfort is that we don't do this alone. We have a Lord who understands, who was tempted but didn't act on it (Hebrews 4:15) so He can and will help us to become our best us and then we can provide the evidence.

There's always a...But

   Personally, I'm always leery of an unsolicited 'compliment', since 9 times out of 10 'but' follows the compliment. Not sure why this is done because most people realize that a 'but' will be following and the words are nearly always a criticism or correction. Corrections are always a positive in my world because the intent is (My) improvement. However, criticism... not so much. 

  Are you the type that tries to 'soften the blow' of criticism by starting out with a compliment? If you do, you might want to reconsider. Everyone needs to hear 'unblemished' compliments that are true and related to something they did or said - preferably soon after the action/words because now there's a context for the compliment. People need to feel valued, that what they do and say is seen/heard and appreciated.  'Outta the blue' compliments are never trusted because they typically come with the 'but'. Just for curiosity sake, if you precede a correction or criticism with a compliment do you think the other person will accept the latter easier? Rarely. Simply remember your own reactions in these situations.

  And there is enormous differences between correction and criticism. Webster, says that correction: "...a change that makes something right, true, accurate." One definition says that it is, "a bringing into conformity with a standard". The definition of criticism: "...the act of expressing disapproval and of noting the problems or faults of a person or thing; a remark or comment that expresses disapproval of..." Obviously, two different contexts and desired ends. I've never been too certain of what the goal of criticism is, then again... I rarely enjoy criticism, which often is expressed in front of others.

  Correction is usually prefaced with either a question (can you explain why you said/did - fill in the blank). This way the person who is asking understands your why. These are times that I call 'object lesson' teaching opportunities. The person being corrected then can learn rather than feeling defensive. The positive end result of a more effective person and goal accomplishment can occur. When you give or receive compliments - drop the 'but', don't couple correction with an attempt to 'smooth over' your comments. There should always be a purpose to your correction and not merely 'my way or the highway'. In asking questions, you too may discover new options.

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Succumbing

  If you believe that the devil has ANY control over you, then you've bought into a lie. He has only the control that you allow him. Sadly, since we seem to be so deluded in a number of ways in a number of areas... that can grow into a significant amount of control. And, as you give him control over one aspect, this can pave the way into other and more areas of control. But... and thank heavens for the 'but' - this assumed control by the devil can be trumped. When you realize the state you are in, you can always turn to the Lord and seek His forgiveness which results in your cleansing (1John 1:9). You can accomplish what the prodigal son did when he returned - you can stand again and become who the Lord says you are. 

  Given that the devil does exist, he really has nothing and only comes to steal, kill, and destroy (John 10:10)... why give him even an inch? Yet we all seem to do this. But the 'everyone does this' excuse really is so lame - aren't we able to withstand the temptations of the devil? Or are we so quisling that we think we have no control but to do as bidden. Rubbish. We are more than conquerors (Romans 8:37) - remember?! So why don't we act this way? Why don't we act as the conquerors we are? Probably because we really don't believe in ourselves. We forget that we have been made a new creation (2Corinthians 5:17-22) when we accepted Jesus as Lord.

  In a very real way, the reason we succumb to lies of the devil is that we aren't completely confident in who we have been made and are becoming. Even when we can quote the verses that tell us who we are, what we can do, what we have to be, etc. we give the devil far more credit, control, and authority than he actually possesses.  Point is, though, that You really are able to stand against him, especially when you realize you have help. Example: he can't read your mind. The only way he knows he is successful is through your actions - if you acted on his suggestions.

  If you feel you have been and are a succumb-er... then stop. You don't have to complicate, continue, and compound the situation. You, as in YOU, are able, are empowered to not succumb to the lies. However, the operative word is YOU. This is an act that is only possible when you choose to stand on who you are and whose you are. Yes, there will be moments of falling for the lies - but once you become aware, you can take the appropriate action. You don't need to succumb.

Birthday present

  Earlier today I began writing my next 'article' for the church's newsletter. Since it will be for December, I thought about the wonder of Christmas and all that attends this time of year. Personally, it is and has always been my favorite time of the year. It's those 'attends' things that occur that I've always enjoyed: the smells of baking cookies, the soft snow as it drifts silently down, the carolers (though that's typically for a different era), the fun of trying to buy something reallllly special to give, the music, the cocoa after sledding or skating, the generally good mood everyone exudes. There are other aspects, but that paints the picture.

  Then I thought about what Christmas means, and I wrote the following:

     December is the month that we celebrate our Lord’s birthday. In the hustle and 
  bustle of preparing for Christmas, do we give the ‘reason for the season’ much 
  thought? Not criticism, unless the Lord is only an afterthought rather than the 
  center of the celebrating. Regardless, if you were to give the Lord a birthday 
  present... what would you give? What would you hope or want to give – this year? 
  Is this even important to you?

     Those weren’t presumptuous questions... and your answers to them describe 
  the kind of relationship you have with the Lord of Lords, King of Kings... and 
  friend (?). Perhaps the question for you is – do you believe Jesus’ words in 
  John 15:15 are meant for you. They are you know. Jesus was calling His disciples, 
  friends. And if He is your Lord, He also is Your friend. Can you imagine yourself
  in this type of relationship? If not... why? How do you describe/define 'friend'?

     It was His choice to offer you friendship... it is yours to accept – or not. Perhaps,
  this is the birthday present you can give, a more engaged and active friendship. 
  He has so very much waiting for you to discover and that He wants to enrich and 
  enable you. But with every gift... you have to accept it. If you think the problem 
  is you – that you believe you aren’t ‘good enough’ or righteous to be a friend? 
  Never forget 2 Corinthians 5:17-22 – you were made, by Him, righteous. Period. 
  Friendship is a joy to discover and explore. It is also a wonderful gift to give.

  It's true, you know. Friendship was extended to us. Remember the verse that talks about Jesus brought gifts to man when He came? Sometimes we need to be reminded of our 'status' with the Lord. He offered friendship. Did we accept? 

God pleaser?

    Would you define yourself as a person who is or wants to please God? And before you say that this isn't possible, or that everyone would want to do and be this, or how do we know how to please God, or any other response... I would say that we should all have this as a goal and that we all have a book that tells us how (in any situation). I would also quickly add that this is not the simplest or easiest path to walk. 

  HOWEVER, it is also possible for us to be a God pleaser. And how I know this is based on a number of factors (in no particular order): 
1. We are told to renew our mind
2. We have a helper
3. We have a model 

  I would argue that the primary reason to renew is found in 2Corinthians 10:4-5 because we are in a battle. We are a target to the devil, who wants to cause us to fail or, not believe we have been saved so we are totally ineffective. It is critical, I believe, to realize and believe that there is a battle to weaken us, or cause us to fail, or become totally ineffective. Though we may be saved, our testimony is what the devil is seeking to eradicate from us so that our message is at least garbled.  

  The battle is for the mind. We all engage in battles, often with ourselves, in our mind. Who, what wins? The only way to develop the right/proper mindset is to renew our minds. When we accept Jesus as our Lord, we are made a new creation (2Corinthians 5:17...) and this means that we need to renew our minds as well. There are over 15 verses in the Bible that exhort us to renew, example:

  *And be renewed in the spirit of your mind; (Ephesians 4:23) 

  *For which cause we faint not; but though our outward man perish, yet the inward [man] is renewed day by day. (2Corinthians 4:16) 

  *For the weapons of our warfare [are] not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds; (2Corinthians 10:4-5) 

  *Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth. (Colossians 3:2) 

  *And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what [is] that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God. (Romans 12:2)

  *Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things [are] honest, whatsoever things [are] just, whatsoever things [are] pure, whatsoever things [are] lovely, whatsoever things [are] of good report; if [there be] any virtue, and if [there be] any praise, think on these things. (Philippians 4:8) 

  One encouragement is that we need to also realize we aren't in this battle alone. First, the Father prepared armor for us to walk in (Ephesians 6:10-18). Duly note, though, that it is we who put the armor on, we are the ones in the battle so that it is we who need protecting. We do have defensive weapons - the Shield of Faith and the Sword of the Spirit. But again, we are the ones who use the weapons. 

  The second point also speaks to the battle and our effectiveness - The Holy Spirit. He has been sent to be with us, prepare us, help us in this battle. Never forget Jesus' words that define what the Holy Spirit is and does: (John 14:16 AMP) - Comforter, Counselor, Helper, Intercessor, Advocate, Strengthener, Standby - the Spirit of Truth. We are equipped in every area of our lives to be effective and successful.  

  In terms of the 3rd point, Jesus was sent as our example, our model. Paul exhorts us to mimic him as he mimics the Lord. With Jesus as our example, we can act accordingly. In this we can be a God pleaser. The one verse that would exhort me and provide a standard in order to achieve is found in Hebrews 4 (AMP):

     "For he who has once entered (God's) rest also has ceased from

      human labors ... (v.10)
      Let us therefore be zealous and exert ourselves and strive
      diligently to enter that rest (of God, to know and experience
      it for ourselves..." (v.11) 

  The goal is hearing Matthew 25:23 spoken to us - 

     "Well done, good and faithful servant ... enter into the joy of your lord."

Getting to the end before you finish

  That's a quote by Sir Winston Churchill, which was made during the crisis in England after WWII. He was referencing what he felt was his primary responsibility (a lasting peace) while he was in a position of influence as the Prime Minister. The comment was made approximately 18 months before he retired from 'active duty'. I think that he sensed that his time was limited and was concerned that he would not be able to accomplish his goal before the end occurred. After leading England through WWII and the beginning of recovery, he eventually retired at age 81 but remained active till his death at age 90.

  The point I'm making is that we sometimes think we have gotten to our (the) end, realizing we haven't finished. In Churchill's case, though he retired, he remained as an active member of the House of Commons and completed writing his history, plus countless other activities. His focus changed, his actions changed... I seriously doubt he did. What example does this provide us? It really speaks to how we live our lives - intentionally or reactively.

  Intentionally is not defined as stressful, frantic, or obsessive. Intentional according to Webster is: '...done in a way that is planned...'. In reading the synonyms' discussion, the word is further defined as: 

     means done or brought about of one's own will... freedom and 
     spontaneity of choice or action...awareness of an end to be achieved.

Intentional is always our determination, our choice. I would suggest it is also a stronger foundation from which we act. When we act intentional, we are aware of what the possible ramification there may be and are willing to accept any and all responsibility for the results.

  The issue is how we determine what we need to do... before we finish. Whether we need to train someone else in the process to complete the project or whether we will be able to complete it in the time we have available. Unfinished 'business' is always difficult to contend with and troubling. Our planning makes the necessary adjustments to accomplishing the goal - whether by us or whether we need to hand it off.

  This kind of mindset, frame of our operation is how we determine if we get to the end of the (project, plan, our part, etc.) and how we should plan for continuation when necessary. In all this, the goal really may be more than only our part, so it is critical to get the big picture as well - what happened before that got us to where we are now. If you do get to the end before finishing... what have you planned for in order to complete (fill in the blank) is the issue. 

Relationship 101

  The subtitle could read: how to build a relationship in two easy steps. Not daunting. Building a relationship truly is not rocket science, but it isn't casual either. So my title may be somewhat misleading. EVERY relationship needs time, interest in the other person, allowing the other person to make mistakes but not condemning them to staying the same, and equally important - sharing your self. And those are only some of the contexts necessary to building a lasting and deep relationship. If you want only a superficial, no responsibility acquaint-ship basis then this is precisely what you will have. However, if you want a more meaningful relationship then it will begin with - Time  

  Do you remember what you did when you were developing your relationship with your spouse - what was the single most important factor? Time. That was how you began - you spent time with them. And in a variety of settings. This is true when you are developing a friendship with someone else as well. Time is always your friend and can never be rushed. You will discover the other person and yourself in this particular relationship when you allow time to flavor how and what you learn. And yes, there will be misunderstandings, mistakes, mis-steps, surprises, and growth. If your relationship isn't one of growth then it is one of stagnation and will atrophy at some point. Each meeting provides you with more understanding and appreciation of the other person and the relationship. 

  The second factor/condition is focus. Your focus, in these situations, was (should have been/needed to be) more on discovering who the other person was/is. However, you can't put this in stone. Each of us changes, even if it is only minuscule-ly, each day with each interaction. This always enhances the delight of discovery. You too change each day and your new discoveries. My point is that you need to be focused, not tensely but intently, on discovering the other person - allowing them to express who they are at that moment but also allowing them to grow. And in this context, talking with them about yourself and how all this expands and influences the relationship.

  Simplistic? Perhaps but it also is one standard to consider when you enter any new relationship. I would also suggest that this is also the foundation on which you build your relationship with the Lord. If you continually force the Lord to 'be out there' rather than building a relationship with Him in your world - then you severely limited yourself and don't discover who the Lord is in your life. If He wasn't interested in relationship then one of the gifts of salvation wouldn't be righteousness (2Corinthians 5:17-22). It is impossible for a relationship with the Lord to exist apart from righteousness (2Corinthians 6:14). I believe that we don't have righteousness apart from being born again and being a new creation. But with our new status we can develop a meaningful, intimate relationship with the Lord. It still takes time and focus - our decision.

Loyalty

  2Chronicles 16:9  

     "For the eyes of the Lord run to and fro throughout the whole 
      earth, to show Himself strong on behalf of those whose heart 
      is loyal to Him."

I've always liked this scripture. Then again, I would classify myself as a candidate for the Lord's strength. This isn't a crisis cry on our part, I think it's more of a state, a status one enters into. Personally, I find my need for the Lord's help and hand to be a daily need, not an occasional one. Therefore, realizing that the Lord said his eyes are roaming the whole earth to demonstrate His strength on our behalf speaks volumes and also provides comfort.

  This verse is letting us know that He isn't waiting for our cry of 'Help!', but He is actively engaged in watching over us so that He is our 'ever present help in time of need' (Psalm 46:1). It also tells us the condition - to those whose heart is loyal to Him. Does this describe you, me? Are our hearts loyal to Him? Do we demonstrate this in our lives? Would others know that our loyalty lies with the Lord? It really isn't the most effective demonstration of loyalty when it is a 'foxhole promise' to Him.

  Obviously He knows our hearts. He is aware of what we do. I believe that this verse is aimed at us - at our knowing that our hearts are loyal to Him. Can we truly say we are loyal? If so, then how do we know? Are we 'fair weather' Christians - when it doesn't require anything from us. Or 'Sunday' Christians -only at service with fellow Christians, but out in the world we act and speak differently? How do you define, describe, and act loyal?

  I'm not pointing fingers, I'm asking hard questions of us all. We expect a great deal from the Lord and His hand in our lives. He really asks little of us, but do we even do the little? Granted, loyalty isn't a little thing, but we are talking about who we are as Christians - and that isn't a little thing either. If we define and describe ourselves as Christians when we are talking with the Lord, or fellowshipping with other Christians... then shouldn't we also be loyal to this designation when we are in the world? You are watched by non-believers and they define 'Christian' by what they see in you. Acting, speaking, being loyal is never a little thing.

Navigating

     "... Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle. Uncertainty was a 
      fundamental part of nature, and what people knew--what
      people thought they knew--was imprecise at best. It all
      depended on who was telling the story."

I read that in Susan Elia MacNeal's Maggie Hope series (Mrs. Roosevelt's Confidante, p. 316) which got me thinking about uncertainty, navigating, and how we go about building our (rock solid?) foundation. What stories are we listening to? And how/if we understand how this influences our building.

  These are a great number of issues, related and not, that impact on how we discover our foundation stones. Why we do as we do, believe as we do, has to rest on some basis and knowing our 'why' makes our beliefs and actions more understandable and 'secure'. However, never fear a challenge to your foundation. It may be a warning of an area that's not as strong and needs strengthening. Or, a new thought that may cause you to tweak or refine an area. Or... (fill in the blank). BUT, if it is a secure part of your foundation then any attack will never cause it to fail. If your reaction is anger, then perhaps it isn't as strong as you thought.

  Navigating should be a natural response to living in the world. There are always boulders and sometimes we don't realize how deep they are ingrained, but we always have our manual (Bible) and our adviser (Lord) to help us through whatever we face. Sometimes this will mean navigating around the issue, sometimes it may simply be confronting it and as you move toward it, discovering that it isn't as great a threat as initially thought. And yes, sometimes it means making certain your armor is on and ready.

  Navigating, uncertainty, and stories all influence how we go from point A to point B. Uncertainty can become an adventurous friend or it can be seen as a threat to where we are and where we need/want to go. And many times this determination of which view of uncertainty we take is based in our experiences and the stories we've heard. How much do we allow the negative experienced stories influence what we do? Is this based in other's experiences or our own? 

  As I've grown older I tend to view stories and my experiences as as information. Something to be aware of. Never forget that a positive experience with (fill in the blank) may not always repeat itself - it can become a detriment, especially if you don't allow the 'new' to express itself as new. It still can be a positive outcome, but never assume. 

  Life is not on a 'repeat dial' because it is vital and changing and challenging and... and... Don't live today in yesterday. Equally, don't life today in tomorrow. The seas may be rough, which requires a different set of skills, or it may be calm, which require a less intentional skill, or it may change on a dime. I believe that navigating is a learned skill that practice allows us to improve when we take an intentional view of life. Uncertain - yes. And each day you begin a new story to tell, to remember.  

Unworthy

  Feel that way? Believe that lie? Don't you realize that at the moment you accepted Jesus as your Lord you stopped being unworthy, stopped being a wretch? It has absolutely nothing to do with you! This is the point. The devil keeps shoving the fact that you aren't worthy so that you won't become all that the Lord intends for you. 

  Bottom line - you are no longer unworthy and it is summed up in your acceptance of Jesus. He's the one who makes you worthy - not you! But YOU are the one who has to understand and walk in this. Evidence? Read again 2Corinthians 5:17-22

     "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things
      have passed away; behold all things have become new." (17)

This is you. 'New' defined by Strong is: 'new, unused, fresh, novel'. In another place it is defined as a brand new species never before seen. Who you were is transformed into who you are becoming. I especially like how the Amplified Bible expresses this verse:

     "Therefore if any person is [ingrafted] in Christ (the Messiah) he
      is a new creation (a new creature altogether); the old [previous
      moral and spiritual condition] has passed away. Behold the fresh
      and new has come!

  I believe that this is why we are 'born again'. Without this new start we are still lost in who we were. Still make mistakes? Of course. We all do and this is the reason that we have the assurance that

     "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our
      sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. (1John 4:1:9)
     
     "And if anyone sins, we have an Advocate with the Father, Jesus
      Christ the righteous." (2:1)

  Actually, this reality should end the discussion, but it rarely does. It is critical for us to understand and accept that every possibility is covered and that we truly can walk as worthy. We are told to put off the old man and put on the new (Ephesians 4:22-24) - this is our part, our role. It is also our decision. We can use the words Jesus used when He was tempted by satan - "...it is written" (Matthew 4) And you never have to explain or justify yourself to the devil... he is NOT your Lord!

  Whether a new Christian or one who has been walking with the Lord for a long time... we all are susceptible to the devil's wiles and lies. What we need to do is to remember Who we are, Whose we are, and walk in all that is prepared for us in the Lord. We can. When we believe we have become worthy through the One who made is new, we really are conquerors. 

Judgmental - Judging

  They are not the same! I sometimes think we get the two mixed up and attribute a common definition for both to be the same. They're not! What they do have in common is that both are actions... very obvious. Have you thought about them? Which do you see as your primary behavior? Confused? As a Christian I did mixed them up and then wondered about what was 'right and proper'. Since the scripture does not and is not contradictory - what do I read that gives me a proper definition and understanding for each?

  In my world of definitions, 'judgmental' is the worse of the two words because of the implication of judge, jury, and sentencing with a smattering of "guilty" before the 'case' even reaches the court. With those ideas and people we disagree with, often an out of hand determination (based on 'feelings' with no substantiation? or because of others' words and opinions?). How do we act to determine if we are in disagreement, or merely a misunderstanding? And, where are the common grounds? And I do NOT mean compromising nor 'inclusion' for the sake of including. is there any common ground for discussion (iron sharpening iron - Proverbs 27:17) or understanding? We need to discover whether we are using different words but the definitions are the same... or the same words with different definitions...  And 'no', sometimes there isn't. Point is, what is our 'proper' response?

  From one perspective, Paul talks about being all things to all men in order that he might save some (1Corinthians 9: 19-23). But that did not mean disavowing Who he believed nor what he believed - this is not compromise. Perhaps one question might be - who are we 'judging'? The other person - their words and/or actions? Ourselves - especially in our reactions? Is that other person a Christian or an unbeliever; and how do we 'judge' discriminate between right and wrong?
Obviously, there are great many considerations when we judge. And when we act on our judgments - do we judge or do we act judgmental? 

  We are told to 'judge not' and to 'judge ourselves' - contradictory? No. Confusing at times - yes. When you do a study about judging, we discover a basis on which we should judge. There are scriptures that focus on how we should judge, who we should judge, and how we should act. The first person we need to judge is ourselves. Example: in 1 Corinthians 11:31-32 Paul says:

     "For if we would judge ourselves, we would not be judged. But
      when we are judged, we are chastened by the Lord, that we may
      not be condemned with the world."

  There are numerous scriptures that talk about judging: John 7:24, 12:47-48, Romans 2:3, 2Timothy 4:1, James 4:11 are only a few. When you do a word study on judging - most of it is in relation to yourself. But it does relate to the fellowship of believers. However, I have yet to read a scripture that tells us to be judgmental. These are not the same concepts. But is this our behavior? Hopefully not.

THIEF!

  This is really a two-part question: who is the thief and what is taken? There are a variety of thieves and many people experience more than one type. The fallout from being robbed can be extremely long-lasting and affect more areas of your life than imagined. Some examples of the thieves are stress, low self-esteem, real and/or imagined expectations (from others and self-imposed), lack of time and resources, etc. There are others that you could... fill in the blank, the point is that there are a vast array of forces that seem to have you in their headlights, aiming to disrupt you, your goals, your hopes...

  Sometimes it seems like there are a host of thieves working together against you. I would also suspect that, at times, we are waiting for them to emerge, while other times we are blindsided. But the emotional toll that is exacted can be crippling. I would contend that any and all thieves have the same 'goal', the same focus - to get our eyes off of whatever we are doing and focus on them, typically on our 'lack'. One of the victims thieves take from us is our energy. We can quickly be consumed in the stress and thus have less available for the task. Another victim is our confidence, especially in our ability to accomplish (fill in the blank). Peace is another casualty, and dreams, hopes, joy... faith.

  You DO remember who you are, don't you? And Whose you are - yes? Then why do we appear to act as people who are being tosses to and fro by every wind of doctrine, as having no foundation with no standard? Face it, we sometimes lie down and accept 'our fate'. Stuff and nonsense! Why? Granted, this can also happen when we go into those places '...where even angels wouldn't venture', but I'm not talking about those. I'm talking about when we allow ourselves to be robbed. Have you also noted that these times can also be characterized by our own lack of initial (passion?, confidence?, commitment?, preparation?, etc.) to the goal?

  If God calls you to something then, and you only have a grain of mustard-seed faith, it's sufficient so give all you can to it. Don't allow the thief to deter your, especially if you are robbing yourself and abetting the thief. Thieves don't care about you, except to make you feel impotent to do anything to stop them. Funny thing though... the only way they know if they are successful is IF you act on what they whisper in your ear. They are NOT all wise, all knowing, all powerful - they lie. Don't buy into what they say You are. Remember Whose you are!

Prepared and ready!?

   I don't know about you, but sometimes it feels like, though I do have my armor on, that my shield and sword are in my hands but my hands are lying simply at my side. Ever feel that way? And, yes, the operative word is 'feeling'. But when we ignore our feelings or try and push them away or down, this never works. Our feelings ARE our feelings and attempts to distance ourselves from them is impossible to accomplish. Our focus should be in acknowledging them, whether they are fact or fancy, and then dealing with/resolving them. They won't simply go away.

  When I am in one of my moods that takes my eyes off of the goal, purpose then I really am compromised and ineffective - hate that. However, letting my shield and sword merely hang down is even worse - I open myself to other attacks (real and imaginary). Been there? Do you find yourself in these situations far more often than you thought? Do you 'hope' that everything will just go away? And... do you know how long these times last? Do you know what you do when you discover than you are not fulfilling who you are and what you are about? 

  I believe that I have discovered that we are always empowered, always have a helper who is with us... but sometimes we either simply forget that we are prepared. I also believe that not all these times can be attributed to our enemy, the devil, that sometimes we are his best weapon... against ourselves. Silly when you think about it, nevertheless we can be our own worse enemy. When we don't act on who and what we've become (read again 2Corinthians 5:17-22) and that a Helper has been sent to be with us... then we are shooting ourselves in the foot. 

  Why believe a lie? 'Can't' is an effective weapon in the arsenal against us that we or 'others' use. Who sezs? Isn't God's word far more effective against these attacks? Remember what Jesus did when He was tempted by the devil? He responded with - "It is written..." (Matthew 4). This can be our defense against whatever is telling us we aren't or can't or... Remember Romans 8:31-39), especially v. 37 

     "Yet in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him
      who loved us."

That tells us that we are MORE than, read it again, MORE than conquerors. What do you need conquering - through Him, we are MORE. We are always prepared - it's up to us to be ready. Get your armor on (Ephesians 6), make certain you have all the parts and they are shined. We are MORE...

Indifference

  I'm beginning to think that indifference is worse than hatred, or any of the negative emotions because there is no reaction. One doesn't act/do anything. How can you talk with, question, or 'debate' with people who are totally indifferent?! You can't! It becomes a completely frustrating feeling and situation. And if you are passionate about the (fill in the blank - idea, plan, context, person, etc.) then you feel not only frustrated but incompetent. The latter is not accurate but that doesn't diminish the feeling.

  Remember the scripture (warning) in Revelations about being hot/cold (my definition of indifference)? In Revelation, John is fulfilling the command to speak to the 7 churches a warning and an encouragement. The words to one church is:

     "...I know your works, that you are neither cold nor hot, I could
      wish you were cold or hot. So then, because you are lukewarm,
      and neither cold or hot. I will vomit you out of My mouth." (3:14-22)

What a tremendous condemnation! But how do you feel with those who act that way - neither yes nor no? Frustration would be rampant, you don't know what they are or want and as such can do nothing. So do you meet indifference with indifference?

  To 6 of the 7 churches, there are words of commendations, criticism, instruction, and promise. But to the indifferent church there was no commendation. Fortunately, there is always instruction and promise, because one can always choose to change. If there is an incredible lesson to be learned about judgment or correction it is that God never warns without following through but if you notice, He also provides a means of escape - if we change then we won't experience the judgment waiting. 

  Indifference is a killer. It saps the strength of those who are trying to do what they believe is important. It wastes people, time, resources, and anything that will aid in goal achievement. Sadly, I'm not sure there is anything someone else can do to dilute the affect of indifference from another. It is always our decision and choice to be indifferent. But ... why? I don't believe indifference is the result of fear - it's simply the manifestation of not caring. And carrying is a choice. 

Don't be a ...'just'

  For purposes of understanding, I'm defining/characterizing 'just' as: the mindset and behavior that does only the minimum; barely does what is expected; the attitude of not caring; spreads discontent knowingly and unaware. Why this is occurring is not necessarily known and understanding is rarely sought. Unhappily, the negative by-product can be pervasive in that it infects all those in association with the 'carrier'. Sadly, positive growth and productivity will not be achieved for whoever and whatever is effected.

  If you are the leader in this situation, then you need to address it with everyone as soon as you recognize it, because a 'just' attitude touches and spreads, infecting or affecting all who are involved. Often this malaise has a 'reason' that not only needs to be addressed, but also can be resolved. Those that have been infected don't always realize this or know how to 'fix' it. 'Just' can become aggressive in its impact. Pussyfooting with this never works, you have to confront the behavior and underlying reasons. Resolution (in my world) is possible! Blame, pointing fingers rarely is an effective devise for change.

  If you are the 'carrier' then you need an attitude check and quickly. Do you see that you are helping to create an environment of mediocrity? Do you care? Do you know why what is happening... is happening? Why are you in this funk? Are you willing to extricate yourself with or without assistance?  In the beginning, did you like your work or was it only a job? Did you begin with a positive attitude and if so, what happened that changed for you? These questions really do need answers before you can move from where you are into a healthier environment.

  I suspect most people have periods of 'just' but it doesn't last long and doesn't impact those you work and live with. It isn't a particularly happy place for anyone but band aid-ing will never last. For the carriers - remember a time in which 'just' wasn't your modus operandi, when you enjoyed and grew. Can this be created now? What are you willing to do to come to such an attitude? For the leaders - remember what the working milieu was when productivity and positive personal growth was occurring. What's missing from that time?

  Granted - conditions constantly change and this always impacts the milieu and subsequent reactions. However, what is the guiding desire by those who have control, influence, and authority to create? Is being a 'just' the only option, a kind of self-defense? No. You can always choose to be the best you, you can be in whatever situation you find yourself. Your attitude, Your willingness to Be determines what happens for you. You may not be able to influence everything or everyone, but you can do so with you. 'Just' is always your decision.