Hurt and Healed: Healed

Part 2  Healed

Are you more familiar with 'healed' than hurt ... or less? Maybe one of the questions is - when do you know you are healed? Feelings, yes but more - that knowing that goes beyond mere facts. And healed is more than the lack of pain. And where's the location of healing: spirit, soul, body?

Where are your thoughts on those statements and questions? Do you have your answers? Walking in health, being healed - this is not something to slight. You NEED to know. First issue: knowing you are healed. It's important to know if for no other reason then that you can be more totally involved, intentional. It can be too easy to slip into the 'not sick but not well' either frame of reference. Years ago they might have called it the 'blahs' - the not wrong, but not right. Incredibly unproductive in this state. So look at what you've been doing in the last 24-48 hours... accomplishments? Check your heart... peaceful? focusing outward and not inward all the time? Mind... active and creative. These all are little signs of health.

Next issue: more than the lack of pain. If you still feel pain... where's it's location? Body? Soul? If I were to be completely honest with myself, when I'm in 'pain' it's too often in my soul, emotions to be precise. Really quite silly of me, but there you are. So what's my 'remedy' when I'm in pain? First - allow myself a bit of time to moan - you gotta get the moaning out, you really can't progress if all you do is stuff it down. After the moaning, apologize to the Lord... again. Then look at your why of moaning. If it's legit then forgive whoever is the source, especially including yourself. Then look at what may be behind it - perhaps a spiritual attack? Do you really want to give him a 'win'? Yes, sometimes it does mean pulling yourself up by the bootstraps. But also remember, you have the Lord with you to aid in this.

If it's physical pain, then go to the healer. 

   "There the Lord issued a ruling and instruction for them and put them to the test. He said, “If you listen carefully to the Lord your God and do what is right in his eyes, if you pay attention to his commands and keep all his decrees, I will not bring on you any of the diseases I brought on the Egyptians, for I am the Lord, who heals you.” [Exodus 25b-26]

I seem to be running to Him constantly... which I attribute to the fact that I live in an aging body. But He never turns me away, He always heals - perhaps not in the same way each time but I always am healed. 

I would suggest we all play a major role in being healed and living in health. But you need to decide that for yourself.

Taking for granted???

First, I'm not talking about you feeling you are taken for granted. Nor am I referring to You taking another person for granted. I'm talking about do you take the Lord for granted? The answer is a rousing - YES. But we all do. The fact that we all do is not a license that we can... or even should. It's a statement that we do.

I think that I would partially promote that this isn't all bad. If you are taking the Lord for granted it must be because you Trust Him. That He is faithful. That He is always with you (me). That His Word is true. That He has proven this many times over. That's the part that isn't all bad. But if this is all we ever do, the sum total of our involvement with the Lord... then this is a bad. Have you ever looked at scripture to define you? Have you ever considered what it is that the Lord expects from you (me).

   "And do not be conformed to this world [any longer with its superficial values and customs], but be transformed and progressively changed [as you mature spiritually] by the renewing of your mind [focusing on godly values and ethical attitudes], so that you may prove [for yourselves] what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect [in His plan and purpose for you]." [Romans 12:2]

   "He has told you, O man, what is good; And what does the Lord require of you

Except to be just, and to love [and to diligently practice] kindness (compassion),

And to walk humbly with your God [setting aside any overblown sense of importance or self-righteousness]?"  [Micha 6:8]

   "But a time is coming and is already here when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit [from the heart, the inner self] and in truth; for the Father seeks such people to be His worshipers. God is spirit [the Source of life, yet invisible to mankind], and those who worship Him must worship in spirit and truth.”  [John 4: 23-24]

   "Study and do your best to present yourself to God approved, a workman [tested by trial] who has no reason to be ashamed, accurately handling and skillfully teaching the word of truth."  [2 Timothy 2:15]

   "Therefore I urge you, [b]brothers and sisters, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies [dedicating all of yourselves, set apart] as a living sacrifice, holy and well-pleasing to God, which is your rational (logical, intelligent) act of worship."  [Romans 12:1]

Shall I stop? I could go on. These scriptures represent WHO we should become and how we should act! Are these the Lord's expectations about/from us? The easy answer is - yes and it's a process. Granted. The difference I would suggest is in the behavior toward the one not fulfilling the 'expected', taking for granted. 

The Lord is well aware of our weaknesses and He also is involved moment-by-moment is helping us grow in these areas. Why would He give us His armor if He didn't want us protected? Why would the ministry of the Holy Spirit be so directed by bringing to our remembrances the Lord's teachings? Why is the Holy Spirit our teacher/guide/standby/etc. if He wasn't going to help us fulfill who and what we can be? Hebrews 4:15 states:

   "For we do not have a High Priest who is unable to sympathize and understand our weaknesses and temptations, but One who has been tempted [knowing exactly how it feels to be human] in every respect as we are, yet without [committing any] sin."

And now... how do we act when what we want isn't fulfilled immediately? Rarely a pretty picture. I would suggest the behavior we should employ is:

   "7 Ask and keep on asking and it will be given to you; seek and keep on seeking and you will find; knock and keep on knocking and the door will be opened to you. 8 For everyone who keeps on asking receives, and he who keeps on seeking finds, and to him who keeps on knocking, it will be opened." [Matthew 7:7-8]

It's our ... and keep on...  that's important. Don't just 'toss a prayer' and I would also suggest that we not turn to the Lord only in crisis  situations. The Lord has made a way for relationship. Our involvement in growing and developing a personal relationship with the Lord stops us from simply assuming that the Lord, asked or not, will take care of us. Taking Him for granted is incredibly sad. This is the Creator of the Universe that is waiting for us...

   "Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with that person, and they with me."  [Revelations 3:20. NIV]

Hurt and Healed: Hurt

Part 1 Hurt 

  I read (or heard) a phrase that really captured me. “Hurt people hurt people. Healed people heal people.” I have no idea who to credit this to but goodness, what a picture is painted. If you say that this is obvious and rather simple - I’m not so sure. Sometimes it is the obvious and simple that is the most profound. And, in 4 words there is ample opportunity for multiple understandings.

  How do you react when you are around people who are obviously hurt? With platitudes and then make as quick an escape as possible. But as Christians, that’s not how we should respond. If ever there is should be a hallmark to our behavior, the word is compassion. And compassion is an act. In the moment that hurt is recognized and acknowledged in another we can extend compassion... even when they are wrong. Dealing with the 'right'/'wrong' will be necessary but we don't have to wound our wounded.

   “Rejoice with those who rejoice [sharing others’ joy], and weep with those who weep [sharing others’ grief]." [Romans 12:15]

   "Carry one another’s burdens and in this way you will fulfill the requirements of the law of Christ [that is, the law of Christian love].  ...

But each one must carefully scrutinize his own work [examining his actions, attitudes, and behavior], and then he can have the personal satisfaction and inner joy of doing something commendable without comparing himself to another. For every person will have to bear [with patience] his own burden [of faults and shortcomings for which he alone is responsible]." (Galatians 6:2-5)

  I am confident of one thing - don’t try to ‘fix’ them. Sometimes they just want to be able to talk, some just want the quiet touch of a hug. Others don’t want anything other than a quiet presence. Give according to their need, not how you want to be comforted. And, how many times have we seen (and experienced) a lashing out by that hurt person. Grant them the grace that you would want in these circumstances.

   Other side of the coin: have you ever been that hurt person? And have you (often angrily) reacted by hurting the person who is, typically somewhat awkwardly, trying to console you? And, I suspect, you sometimes recognize this but, needing to get the emotion expressed, continue. We all are blameless. But being 'brave' or 'stoic' doesn't always meet our need. 

  Scriptures that speak to hurt whether ours or another:

   "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those whose spirits are crushed." [Psalms 34:18, NLT]

   "The Lord is near to the heartbroken And He saves those who are crushed in spirit (contrite in heart, truly sorry for their sin)." [AMP]

When I first read the verse in Psalms I could see 2 different types: one is the person crushed from the outside and the other from their own actions. And this is the reality of 'hurt' - we can experience it from someone else but we can also experience it as a reaction to what we have done. Never assume the source, in someone else, of the hurt.

 The Lord gives us a promise when we are hurt that we can choose to follow or continue to wallow in our feelings:

   "I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you [who are willing to learn] with My eye upon you." [Psalms 32:8]

This is almost a description of one of the gifts the Lord brings with His promise to never leave us - how to handle hurt.

Invited. Involved?

We know we are so much more confident and enabled to be fruitful when our senior partner is the Lord. And we even might do a good job of inviting Him in… but do we involve Him? Do we let Him be Lord in the midst? Or do we kinda smile and say ‘Welcome Lord’ and then turn to what we are doing with little to no ‘invitation’ for His participation?

Splitting hairs? I don't think so. i would suspect that we all tend to miss, set aside, ignore, etc. some of the simpler things we do that have far reaching affects. Simple example: we know from scripture that a promise from the Lord is that He would never leave us or forsake us (Hebrews 13:5). But being INVOLVED in our lives does require our invitation. Do you have an ongoing conversation with Him? When faced with opportunity, obstacle, ongoing... does your first thought become - Lord, what is my best response? Probably not. No blame but we all could do considerably better.

Why do we stop at inviting Him in and don't continue the conversation? As I look back I can see those times in which He enhanced what I gave Him. Involved, in my world, means intentionally providing all I am and have so that He can enhance my contribution. But it's also keeping an extra ear and eye conscious that He is with me and willing to be involved in my world. A word of 'warning' - He doesn't always answer immediately. Sometimes we have to wait on what He wants for us.

   "So the Lord must wait for you to come to Him so He can show you His love and compassion. For the Lord is a faithful God. Blessed are those who wait for His help." [Isaiah 30:18]

   “Look! I stand at the door and knock. If you hear my voice and open the door, I will come in, and we will share a meal together as friends." [Revelation 3:20]

This last verse assures us that He is right here, right now and is available to be with us. The point - IF. If you hear and open. This is a incredible promise and it includes us in the doing. Again - it is our choice. Do we want the Lord involved? If we don't... exactly what is it that we are doing/saying that we don't want Him to know? Kinda silly because He is Omni everything. There are no secrets.

But what is it that the Lord brings when He enters our lives by participating, by partnership, by being the Senior Partner? Scripture indicates at least 45 gifts, some of which are:

        Faith                                         Righteous  
        Peace                                        Access to the Father  

        God's grace                                Love  

        The Holy Spirit                           Hope  

        Eternal Life.                               Salvation.  

Every one of those gifts enhances who you are and what you can do. Operating in His favor grants us more than we realize. But having Him with us, in the situation enhances ... the situation.

Giving Glory...

I've been thinking about the phrase, 'giving God the glory'. What does this mean? How is this displayed? Do we only give lip service to this? Or, is it a conscious understanding that we do give the glory to God - at the moment?

Granted each of us has to answer these questions for ourselves, but is there some kind of universal understanding of what this is/means? Part of it can be summed up in our taking credit for (whatever). Do we consciously know and act on the fact that we are in partnership with the Lord in our 'works'? Are we too people conscious to want their praise? Never forget that the partnership is based on the Lord being the senior partner and we are the junior partner. HOWEVER, the unmitigated joy is that we are part of this process - the Lord chooses to work through His creation.

Look at the following verses:

   John 15:16 "You didn’t choose me, remember; I chose you, and put you in the world to bear fruit, fruit that won’t spoil."

   James 2:18b "...show me your [alleged] faith without the works [if you can], and I will show you my faith by my works [that is, by what I do].”

   Ephesians 2:10 "For we are His workmanship [His own master work, a work of art], created in Christ Jesus [reborn from above—spiritually transformed, renewed, ready to be used] for good works, which God prepared [for us] beforehand [taking paths which He set], so that we would walk in them [living the good life which He prearranged and made ready for us]."

Appreciate what's being said. God chose to create man in HIS image (Genesis 1:26). But He created man with a purpose, a plan (Jeremiah 29:11) - first: it was He who created us, second: He chose us, third: His plan was for us to have works that remain. So how is it that we take the glory? There are many scriptures that talk about if we seek our glory here from men then we miss what the Lord's reward is.

Actually, expressing to others that the honor belongs to the Lord, giving God the glory here, now with those who have seen or experienced what took place should bring us great joy because once again we have the opportunity to witness to who God is and what and how He expresses Himself, especially that He works through us. Giving the honor, the glory to the One who deserves it is only right. It's our privilege to be able to do this.

 

It IS the little things

Seriously... do you realize that it IS the little things that make the most difference. 

   "40 “He who receives and welcomes you receives Me, and he who receives Me receives Him who sent Me. 41 He who receives and welcomes a prophet because he is a prophet will receive a prophet’s reward; and he who receives a righteous (honorable) man because he is a righteous man will receive a righteous man’s reward. 42 And whoever gives to one of these little ones [these who are humble in rank or influence] even a cup of cold water to drink because he is my disciple, truly I say to you, he will not lose his reward.” [Matthew 10:40-42]

I can almost hear you say -
   'well, yes - I can understand the Lord isn't a little thing, and a prophet isn't
    a little thing, nor a righteous man, but a cup of water? I don't think so'.

According to whose standards? Now read these 3 verses backwards.

   "42 And whoever gives to one of these little ones [these who are humble in rank or influence] even a cup of cold water to drink because he is my disciple, truly I say to you, he will not lose his reward. 41 He who receives and welcomes a prophet because he is a prophet will receive a prophet’s reward; and he who receives a righteous (honorable) man because he is a righteous man will receive a righteous man’s reward. 40 He who receives and welcomes you receives Me, and he who receives Me receives Him who sent Me."

A different way of looking at 'little'? In the Lord's eyes sees your heart (1 Samuel 16:7) and honors this. Soooo... do you allow your heart to lead you? Are you aware of the 'little things'? The waitress' eyes of sadness, the anger in someone's words that really aren't directed at you but at someone the speaker can't express to their 'target'. With a child, they cry (visibly) and you know they are sad, hurt, angry, etc. Adults, I believe most don't remember how to cry. Some definitely use it as a weapon or passive aggressive behavior. But we really can tell when someone is crying on the inside first.

Does crying (other than a child's) make you uncomfortable? Are you a 'fixer' and don't know the cause, or sometimes you do, but don't know what to do? Is your primary goal to stop the crying or give comfort? And yes, we do have our scriptural basis - Romans 12:15

   "Rejoice with those who rejoice [sharing others’ joy], and weep with those who weep [sharing others’ grief]."

While it's great fun to add to the joy of those rejoicing... can/will we share in other's grief? Some people seem to have that gifting that just eliminates their own self from the situation and focuses only on the person. Many people stand embarrassed at not knowing what to do or say. Stop trying to find a fix and focus on comforting. The '... I only gave them a hug, I didn't do anything.' But it isn't a little thing.

So what is your definition of a 'little thing'? Does it really apply? In the final judgment...

   "34 “Then the King will say to those on His right, ‘Come, you blessed of My Father [you favored of God, appointed to eternal salvation], inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. 35 For I was hungry, and you gave Me something to eat; I was thirsty, and you gave Me something to drink; I was a stranger, and you invited Me in; 36 I was naked, and you clothed Me; I was sick, and you visited Me [with help and ministering care]; I was in prison, and you came to Me [ignoring personal danger].’ 

37 Then the righteous will answer Him, ‘Lord, when did we see You hungry, and feed You, or thirsty, and give You something to drink? 38 And when did we see You as a stranger, and invite You in, or naked, and clothe You? 39 And when did we see You sick, or in prison, and come to You?’ 40 The King will answer and say to them, ‘I assure you and most solemnly say to you, to the extent that you did it for one of these brothers of Mine, even the least of them, you did it for Me.’" [Matthew 25:34-40]

I rest my case. There really is no such thing as 'little thing' to those who have an outstretched hand to others. It does begin in the heart and then is proved by the hand.

Talk & Listen

I can’t listen and talk at the same time. I really don’t believe anyone can… except for that small percentage that can because they’re only listening to themselves. These people genuinely love to hear the sound of their own voice, though they would vociferously deny this. The 'proof; is that sometimes their response has nothing to do with what's being said because they were already deciding on what they were going to say so they didn't really hear what the last part of the sentence was... sometimes, not even the first part.

Now you need to consider your messages. Do you want them to be heard? Or do you not care? If you care, then do you know your messages are heard? Are you aware of your audience? If your sentences are being incorrectly finished - how do you correct the error? Do you use questions????

Are you guilty of ineffective behavior? Do you want to change? If your responses are 'Yes' and 'Yes'.  You can change you but no one else really can. If you want to be a better listener in order to also be a better responder - then know that there is a remedy. It goes under the title of intentional and/or focused concentration. Take some time and watch your own typical behavior. Do you see a relationship between your response and what was said? Are you pleased with you? 

I really don't think there's a quick 'fix' or the specifics are a 'one size fits all'. One way to begin correcting is to not be the first to respond or give a quick response. And your response may be a question for clarification. Never assume you know what the speaker was saying or that you have the proper response. Questions can be a breathing time for understanding.

Another thing you can do is when the other person is speaking - look at them. Watch their body language which will give you different cues about what they are saying... and why. Not every speaker wants you (anyone) to fix anything, they simply need to be listened to. This intentionality will also reap rewards for you when you are the speaker - watch your audience. See if you can perceive their reactions and understandings. Do you need to say the same thing but with different words to help clarify? 

Do you listen to you when you speak? You should. Hear what it is that you say so you can place yourself as a listener and know if you really are saying what you want others to hear. I realize that this last sentence seems counter intuitive and contradictory to what I said earlier. Not. Try it - you'll see.

Have I said all this before? Oh yes. Repeating myself? It's a message that needs hearing ... a number of times, said in a number of ways. We don't always realize that Listening is really the best way at all times. Listening can become our best method to talk.

Reverse Snobs

Snobs? Snobs! What do you think... can Christians be snobs? Hint: can and should are not the same thing. Seriously... doesn't snobs come from pride? Now the kicker - can Christians legitimately be prideful? Kinda depends on the focus of the pride, how it's displayed, and the results from displaying it.???

   " My fellow believers, do not practice your faith in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ with an attitude of partiality [toward people—show no favoritism, no prejudice, no snobbery]." [James 2:1]

When you read on in verses 2-3 it is very clear that James is writing that snobbery should never exist by giving an example of unacceptable behavior. Perhaps the issue is expressing the joy we have in our salvation - sharing that without being prideful? Actually giving an invitation to the other person is the method because the Father never shows partiality.

However... was is reverse snobbery? Quite honestly I'd never heard of it. So what, exactly, is this?

   "Reverse snobbery, also known as inverted snobbery or anti-snob snobbery, is a term used to describe someone who is overly proud of being associated with the common people and may look down on those who have more education, social standing, or ability." [Google]

Aaaaa we've all seen this. But... do we do this? You really can get tripped up by being proud you're saved. Being saved should be the foundational confidence to share our experiences with others and invite them into becoming part of the Family of God. The first step typically is how we share our experience at being saved and especially our continuing journey. 

I'm beginning to think reverse snobs a mate with hypocrisy and yes, we've all seen that in churches. And how sad. The only reason we are saved and our names are written in the Book of Life is not in any way because of us. It's the gracious mercy and grace by God that we are saved.

   "For it is by grace [God’s remarkable compassion and favor drawing you to Christ] that you have been saved [actually delivered from judgment and given eternal life] through faith. And this [salvation] is not of yourselves [not through your own effort], but it is the [undeserved, gracious] gift of God; not as a result of [your] works [nor your attempts to keep the Law], so that no one will [be able to] boast or take credit in any way [for his salvation]. " [Ephesians 2:8-9]

When you see these verses, there's no way you can be a snob. All the blessings and giftings come from the Father - we are the recipients and it is the Lord's graciousness and mercy we receive because of His great love.