According to a recent article I read, the number one reason people church hop or leave their church, whether or not they can articulate this, is that they no longer feel spiritually fed and fulfilled. The real reason is that they no longer feel the church they are attending is encountering God anymore. How tragic! My belief is that encountering God is not only a Sunday morning at church mindset and action, and should be what happens daily and be personal.
But, I would also argue that spiritually fed and fulfilled cuts both ways. Are 'they' (we) bringing God to church with them? Where is their responsibility? If you think the last questions are insensitive or not the point, I think they are. Since the body is the church then isn't it up to the body to make certain that God is invited into being involved in the life of the church? Is the responsibility only that of the church 'leadership' and pastor(s)? What are YOU doing about your church? And it does need to be more than merely greeting people at the service.
I would also suggest that part of the problem is in the identifying and defining what 'spiritually fed and fulfilled' is. This tends to be a very personal definition, regardless of whether the definer even does this and probably isn't a universally held definition/description. Too often this is couched in affective words such as 'feeling', which has multiple definitions. But it is a sense that 'there's something missing'. This last point that 'something's missing' is a valid component in the assessing. Again - are you doing anything about being spiritually fed or are you sitting back expecting 'it' to happen?
If we accept that the church isn't spiritually feeding and fulfilling people, what IS it doing? You can't simply say what isn't happening without identifying what is. If it is to provide the... atmosphere(?) so that the goal of a spiritually fed and fulfilled congregation occurs, this seems to miss the point. Everyone needs to feel and experience fed and fulfilled but we have to come with the attitude and conviction we are involved in the process - not the focus. Remember that God is the focus.
I would suggest we look at what our services should emphasize - praise and worshiping our God, learn who we are as Christians and how we can go about being His hand in our world, and consider how Paul defined services - when we come together (1Corinthians 14:26). Again we get into the issue of defining and determining responsibility - and discovering our individual roles that need to occur for all to be and feel fed and fulfilled.
Monday, September 28, 2015
Friday, September 25, 2015
To the least
Perhaps it's time to stop looking only at what you aren't doing, especially compared to what others are doing and start considering what you are doing. What are YOU doing to fulfill the The Great Commission? Are you doing more? less? different from? what you were doing yesterday? last month? last year? If you aren't doing all you can, will you? Remember, the only person you should compare yourself to is... you.
I would also argue that the 'do' has to have a context. The Great Commission is the purpose and goal, but what you do may not be what someone else does. Never forget the scripture that talks about some plant, some water, and some reap (John 4:35-38, 1 Corinthians 3:6-7). What you do is needed, necessary, and never - just a little thing. You just need to do what you do!!!
I would also argue that the 'do' has to have a context. The Great Commission is the purpose and goal, but what you do may not be what someone else does. Never forget the scripture that talks about some plant, some water, and some reap (John 4:35-38, 1 Corinthians 3:6-7). What you do is needed, necessary, and never - just a little thing. You just need to do what you do!!!
“... inasmuch as you did it to one of the
least of these My brethren,
you did it to Me.” (Matthew 25:40)
you did it to Me.” (Matthew 25:40)
You do realize that Jesus is talking to us,
Christians, and referring to what we do/say to others, both encouragingly and
hurtfully? This entire chapter is talking about when we stand before Him in the
last day and what and who we were and what He will be considering as important (2 Corinthians 5:10). Before you assume that
you are woefully lacking remember how you touch lives.
Each day the people in our world: spouse, children, other customers or employees at the store we are shopping in, etc. – we, by what we say or do have an opportunity to be a blessing to them. As we encounter others, we can encourage them or discourage them. Bottom line... do you believe, in your heart of hearts, that you are doing all that you can? Granted, you could do more, but are you are doing what you can? If so... then take heart! When/If you can do ‘more’ then do so, but until then... do what’s at your hand that you can do!
[Note: I wrote most of this for my church's monthly newsletter, but I thought I would expand it and share here too.]
Each day the people in our world: spouse, children, other customers or employees at the store we are shopping in, etc. – we, by what we say or do have an opportunity to be a blessing to them. As we encounter others, we can encourage them or discourage them. Bottom line... do you believe, in your heart of hearts, that you are doing all that you can? Granted, you could do more, but are you are doing what you can? If so... then take heart! When/If you can do ‘more’ then do so, but until then... do what’s at your hand that you can do!
[Note: I wrote most of this for my church's monthly newsletter, but I thought I would expand it and share here too.]
Tuesday, September 22, 2015
5.5 hours!
We're all aware of the fact that there is only 24 hours in the day. Just as an 'interesting' exercise, let's look at this a moment. The math:
1. If you work outside the home then, typically, at least 8 hours is spent at your place of employment. You have to get to and from home which can be as little as 15 minutes up to over an hour+ in larger cities. To be generous and 'universal' let's say it takes you an additional hour for both the to and from. 9 hours utilized. Remaining: 15 hours.
(However, if you are a 'house spouse' there is no remaining time since you are involved in all the tasks that surround this role - 24/7/365.)
2. Then there's sleep - something that many of us feel we don't get enough of due to our tossing and turning. However, let's do the average of 8 hours. We've now utilized 17 hours. Remaining: 7 hours.
3. Eating and preparing the food, is another activity we engage in daily - 3 meals: being very skimpy let's say 30 minutes each preparing and consuming another 1.5 hours, unless we go out to eat which will add more time, but minimally = 18.5 hours used. Remaining: 5.5 hours.
5.5 hours, does this sound like a lot? Really? 5.5 hours to do all those things you actually may want to do and/or the 'things' you have to do. I've only included the major areas of time-use in our day, but this only begins the process of looking at how we use our time. Let's face it - we all also waste time, but ignoring this... what exactly do we do with the (maximum) 5.5 hours? What would you want to do?
Faced with this choice many tend to do a 'rob Peter to pay Paul'. You pick those tasks and activities that really can't be put off and ignore the rest. It is understandable but rarely effective because at some point you really do have to 'pay Peter'... but at what expense? No choice? Somehow I question this because you are the one choosing to do what, when.
At some point you really are going to have to say, "Enough!" I can't add any thing else to my schedule. One thing you have to remember is that this issue will never go away until you face it. And it is never simple because in every situation that you say 'yes' to... you'll have to say 'no' to something else. I suspect people-pleasers have the most problem.
Just as an aside - the Lord is not the one you should ever say - 'later' to or 'I don't have time to pray/study'. Quite honestly, the time you intentionally spend with Him is far more important. However... it is your life to be lived in the manner you choose. I'm simply presenting the math and indicating one area that I believe should never be short changed.
1. If you work outside the home then, typically, at least 8 hours is spent at your place of employment. You have to get to and from home which can be as little as 15 minutes up to over an hour+ in larger cities. To be generous and 'universal' let's say it takes you an additional hour for both the to and from. 9 hours utilized. Remaining: 15 hours.
(However, if you are a 'house spouse' there is no remaining time since you are involved in all the tasks that surround this role - 24/7/365.)
2. Then there's sleep - something that many of us feel we don't get enough of due to our tossing and turning. However, let's do the average of 8 hours. We've now utilized 17 hours. Remaining: 7 hours.
3. Eating and preparing the food, is another activity we engage in daily - 3 meals: being very skimpy let's say 30 minutes each preparing and consuming another 1.5 hours, unless we go out to eat which will add more time, but minimally = 18.5 hours used. Remaining: 5.5 hours.
5.5 hours, does this sound like a lot? Really? 5.5 hours to do all those things you actually may want to do and/or the 'things' you have to do. I've only included the major areas of time-use in our day, but this only begins the process of looking at how we use our time. Let's face it - we all also waste time, but ignoring this... what exactly do we do with the (maximum) 5.5 hours? What would you want to do?
Faced with this choice many tend to do a 'rob Peter to pay Paul'. You pick those tasks and activities that really can't be put off and ignore the rest. It is understandable but rarely effective because at some point you really do have to 'pay Peter'... but at what expense? No choice? Somehow I question this because you are the one choosing to do what, when.
At some point you really are going to have to say, "Enough!" I can't add any thing else to my schedule. One thing you have to remember is that this issue will never go away until you face it. And it is never simple because in every situation that you say 'yes' to... you'll have to say 'no' to something else. I suspect people-pleasers have the most problem.
Just as an aside - the Lord is not the one you should ever say - 'later' to or 'I don't have time to pray/study'. Quite honestly, the time you intentionally spend with Him is far more important. However... it is your life to be lived in the manner you choose. I'm simply presenting the math and indicating one area that I believe should never be short changed.
Saturday, September 19, 2015
What IS Who
Did you get swept along by the argument that, '...it isn't who I am, it's what I do'? I know I did. I did make allowances that there were some 'things' (not identified but definitely difficult and outside the acceptable) and actions that were not a definition of the person but of the required (?) action. This really is so much nonsense. This really smacks of 'the end justifies the means'. What happens to standards? What happens to character in this particular philosophy? It gets trashed.
I would counter the phrase with the argument that if the behavior was not an indication, definition of the person's 'who', that the 'what' will begin to assume the status of definition... and change (?) the who. It's unavoidable. But why would you even consider the 'what' if it isn't who or how you define yourself? And why would you allow what you do as who you are becoming if it isn't a tenant in your beliefs? Perhaps it is an issue of how you do your what? Regardless, if there is no congruence between who you are and what you do, then you are, minimally, conflicted.
We all have control over how we act and react, when and where, when we accept responsibility for ourselves. No one really has control over us unless we give it to them. The questions: how much are we willing to pay to allow others to define us or allow what we do to define us? The answers are never lightly determined nor accepted. But they are equally unavoidable. We must look at what we do as how we define who we are (and no one said this would be simple.)
No choice? Nonsense. We always have choices. We may not like being put in the position of having to choose, of having to act on what we believe. It isn't simple and it isn't automatic. In some areas of our lives what we do is a deliberate determination. If 'what' is not 'who' you want to be remembered then consider your epitaph - how would you want to be remembered. The words that will be remembered are those that define your character. If what is not who you want to be then it is in your hands to change.
I would counter the phrase with the argument that if the behavior was not an indication, definition of the person's 'who', that the 'what' will begin to assume the status of definition... and change (?) the who. It's unavoidable. But why would you even consider the 'what' if it isn't who or how you define yourself? And why would you allow what you do as who you are becoming if it isn't a tenant in your beliefs? Perhaps it is an issue of how you do your what? Regardless, if there is no congruence between who you are and what you do, then you are, minimally, conflicted.
We all have control over how we act and react, when and where, when we accept responsibility for ourselves. No one really has control over us unless we give it to them. The questions: how much are we willing to pay to allow others to define us or allow what we do to define us? The answers are never lightly determined nor accepted. But they are equally unavoidable. We must look at what we do as how we define who we are (and no one said this would be simple.)
No choice? Nonsense. We always have choices. We may not like being put in the position of having to choose, of having to act on what we believe. It isn't simple and it isn't automatic. In some areas of our lives what we do is a deliberate determination. If 'what' is not 'who' you want to be remembered then consider your epitaph - how would you want to be remembered. The words that will be remembered are those that define your character. If what is not who you want to be then it is in your hands to change.
Wednesday, September 16, 2015
What’s YOUR best way to hear?
I would suggest that each of us have our own best way of hearing. Involved in hearing is the validity of what we do hear because we don't all hear in the same way, or even the same message. One point to remember is - how far removed from the source/subject of the message is the messenger? Remember the old 'gossip' game. Someone would whisper something in the ear of the person next to them, who would pass it on to the person next to them, and so on till the last person spoke the message out loud. This was often occasioned by a great deal of laughter since it was so different from what was originally said.
What you hear is influenced by many factors and not only the actual words. What you are feeling, how attentive you are to what is being said are two of those factors. Then there are the issues of semantics and definitions of words. How articulate the speaker was in the presentation of the message. How the message was conveyed (inflection, intonation, facial expression, etc.). These are some of the factors that influence and affect how and what we hear. But I would contend that YOU are the most significant factor in what you hear.
If we simply divide listening into two categories, audio or visual hearers, ... which are you? Do the words spoken paint a sufficient picture in your thinking to allow you understanding? Or, do you need an 'object lesson' basis to hear? Lastly, how do you react with/about what you heard? Do you apply your hearing, ignore it, or wait till you see how others are reacting? It is important, do you know what you do next?
When you know how best you hear then when messages are presented that don't adhere to your standard, you can make exceptions to your best in order to hear and respond to messages. Our responding to what we hear is important... as long as we let the speaker finish the entire message before we determine what we say or do next. This final point really underscores hearing and responding. It is critical that we let the speaker finish the thought rather than assume. It can be embarrassing if we finish their thought only to discover we got it the wrong way round.
What you hear is influenced by many factors and not only the actual words. What you are feeling, how attentive you are to what is being said are two of those factors. Then there are the issues of semantics and definitions of words. How articulate the speaker was in the presentation of the message. How the message was conveyed (inflection, intonation, facial expression, etc.). These are some of the factors that influence and affect how and what we hear. But I would contend that YOU are the most significant factor in what you hear.
If we simply divide listening into two categories, audio or visual hearers, ... which are you? Do the words spoken paint a sufficient picture in your thinking to allow you understanding? Or, do you need an 'object lesson' basis to hear? Lastly, how do you react with/about what you heard? Do you apply your hearing, ignore it, or wait till you see how others are reacting? It is important, do you know what you do next?
When you know how best you hear then when messages are presented that don't adhere to your standard, you can make exceptions to your best in order to hear and respond to messages. Our responding to what we hear is important... as long as we let the speaker finish the entire message before we determine what we say or do next. This final point really underscores hearing and responding. It is critical that we let the speaker finish the thought rather than assume. It can be embarrassing if we finish their thought only to discover we got it the wrong way round.
Sunday, September 13, 2015
Down and Up
We're all familiar with the phrase/philosophy: "It doesn't make any difference how many times you fall down but how many times you get back up." It's true. The only problem is that if you're the one, flat on your back, and this is being aimed at you, you may feel like strangling whoever is suggesting this - even if it is only the expression on their face that is speaking.
Getting back up is never simple or easy though it really is the only logical option. But what does this mean... exactly? What does getting back up accomplish other than standing upright rather than lying flat on one's back? Obviously getting back up can't include repeating the words/behaviors that got you on your back in the first place. Does this mean 'returning' to the point that occasioned the fall or do you start from where you are? No simple or even standard answer and 'it depends' is not a particularly helpful comment... accurate, just not helpful.
Whether easy or difficult, getting back up requires some exertion on your part and then after standing upright you'll need to do... something. Personally, I've found that when I rush into an action or explanation, I typically compound the problem. The first thing I need to do is to know why I ended up on my back. This answer will get me on the path to a resolution. But, simply knowing what I should have done may now be too late, so I need to know what should be done next.
You obviously started in the direction you were heading for a reason... before you fell - do you remember? Equally important, is it still of value? Or does it need postponing till a more propitious time? I believe it is important that we know why we started and whether we should continue before getting back up or we could find ourselves in the same predicament that occasioned our fall. It does seem counterproductive to simply stand again without considering the issues. Getting back up is critically important to 'moving on' but why do so unthinkingly?
Getting back up is never simple or easy though it really is the only logical option. But what does this mean... exactly? What does getting back up accomplish other than standing upright rather than lying flat on one's back? Obviously getting back up can't include repeating the words/behaviors that got you on your back in the first place. Does this mean 'returning' to the point that occasioned the fall or do you start from where you are? No simple or even standard answer and 'it depends' is not a particularly helpful comment... accurate, just not helpful.
Whether easy or difficult, getting back up requires some exertion on your part and then after standing upright you'll need to do... something. Personally, I've found that when I rush into an action or explanation, I typically compound the problem. The first thing I need to do is to know why I ended up on my back. This answer will get me on the path to a resolution. But, simply knowing what I should have done may now be too late, so I need to know what should be done next.
You obviously started in the direction you were heading for a reason... before you fell - do you remember? Equally important, is it still of value? Or does it need postponing till a more propitious time? I believe it is important that we know why we started and whether we should continue before getting back up or we could find ourselves in the same predicament that occasioned our fall. It does seem counterproductive to simply stand again without considering the issues. Getting back up is critically important to 'moving on' but why do so unthinkingly?
Thursday, September 10, 2015
Words.
I like words. I've always liked words. It's how we communicate with each other. To me, it's the pictures words paint in our hearts and minds that bring such joy or wondering or... Words can bring us information and information is the foundation for making decisions or leading us in new directions. Words can bring us new and confirming understanding... and with understanding many doors open for us. Words are never passive, they are alive. Simply... words can bring us life.
I do realize, though, words can wound and hurt as well. Words can also kill us, at least deeply harm our spirits. Criticism can seem like a knife, scaling us, especially when spoken by someone who doesn't know our history... And, hate-filled words, regardless of the speaker, can have a devastating influence on how we see ourselves. It really isn't true that... 'sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.' Unkind words always hurt. Another example of the power of words.
What kind of words do you speak? Are your words life producing? Or do they bring sadness or pain? Do you speak before you think or do you weigh the implications and ramifications your words produce? Quite honestly I believe we need to be less cavalier about what and how we say what we say. An argument can be made that words are valueless, that it's how we group words that determines the value. True. But do consider the subject - it is us and how we 'handle' words - we are the value added through the inflection in how we say what we say.
As a consequence of all this, I have a great respect for words and never use words lightly. My goal and motivation is to communicate. And to that end, one of my favorite methods is to ask questions. I truly have never met a question I didn't like plus questions are typically value-less. They are stated, or should be, in a neutral way to encourage others to share their thoughts, ideas - their words. Questions and statements should never (my value) be stated with a no option to one's beliefs. This is a reinforcement of the comment by Voltaire:
"I do not agree with what you have to say, but I'll defend to the
death your right to say it."
I do realize, though, words can wound and hurt as well. Words can also kill us, at least deeply harm our spirits. Criticism can seem like a knife, scaling us, especially when spoken by someone who doesn't know our history... And, hate-filled words, regardless of the speaker, can have a devastating influence on how we see ourselves. It really isn't true that... 'sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.' Unkind words always hurt. Another example of the power of words.
What kind of words do you speak? Are your words life producing? Or do they bring sadness or pain? Do you speak before you think or do you weigh the implications and ramifications your words produce? Quite honestly I believe we need to be less cavalier about what and how we say what we say. An argument can be made that words are valueless, that it's how we group words that determines the value. True. But do consider the subject - it is us and how we 'handle' words - we are the value added through the inflection in how we say what we say.
As a consequence of all this, I have a great respect for words and never use words lightly. My goal and motivation is to communicate. And to that end, one of my favorite methods is to ask questions. I truly have never met a question I didn't like plus questions are typically value-less. They are stated, or should be, in a neutral way to encourage others to share their thoughts, ideas - their words. Questions and statements should never (my value) be stated with a no option to one's beliefs. This is a reinforcement of the comment by Voltaire:
"I do not agree with what you have to say, but I'll defend to the
death your right to say it."
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